How to Recognize Hidden Mentorship Moments in Everyday Life
- linnearader
- 6 days ago
- 8 min read
Mentorship isn't always formal—it often hides in plain sight, waiting for us to notice. In this post, I reflect on moments of invisible mentorship that shaped my journey and how you can start spotting them in yours.
The Wake-Up Call: A Missed Masterclass
"Well, you totally missed it," my co-worker said with a knowing smile.
"Missed what?" I asked, genuinely confused.
"During the meeting. Did you notice how Derek managed George? There was an entire masterclass in leadership happening, and you were texting on your phone."
That conversation happened years ago, but it fundamentally changed how I approach professional growth. I realized that mentorship isn't always scheduled, labeled, or announced. Sometimes it happens all around us—if only we have the eyes to see it and the humility to receive it.
Everyday Interactions, Extraordinary Lessons
I’ve learned from my education. I’ve learned from my experience. And most of all, I’ve learned from other people.
Throughout my career I have been lucky enough to work with and be exposed to a great number of different people. Some inside the organization I’ve spent almost 20 years working for, but even more outside the organization. People I see at meetings and events, and individuals who’ve trained me. Most situations have been positive learning experiences, offset by a few learning experiences in what NOT to do.
I could go on and on, word after word, about the individuals and groups that have impacted my career. Rather than listing everyone, I’ll highlight a few of my informal mentors who left lasting impressions.
Real-Life Mentorship Examples That Shaped My Career
My predecessor for my “normal” job was kind of a genius. He probably has one of the driest senses of humor I’ve ever seen, and it complimented the job title of Accountant, perfectly. Knowing the job like the back of his hand was one impressive feat, but the way he presented himself was even more impressive.
He was professional in all areas. He chose his words carefully and treated everyone with respect. There was ONE time he ever raised his voice or got emotional in a conversation…once. I will tell you that the individual that caused that emotion…he totally deserved it! (And, to this day wears the fact that he drew emotion from this mentor like a badge of honor). If you read From Drowning to Thriving: How 7 Simple Reminders Changed My Leadership Journey, you read about how there are times in my life that emotions have poured out of me like a faucet. Observing his emotional control was certainly something I needed in my life.
I learned not only how to complete job tasks from this mentor, but more importantly, how to present myself and how to treat others. I’m in no way a duplicate of him, I’m my own person, but I attribute much of my professional success to his mentorship.
There have been a few other amazing mentors I’ve worked with in my “normal” job. One being the smartest person I’ve probably ever met who taught me 100 ways to look at every situation and how to grow my knowledge. Another has taught me how to look at every situation for the facts and logic, ensuring consistency and organization at every turn.
Outside the organization itself, but through that same organization I’ve met amazing people who’ve taught me more than I can put to words. Doug, Lew, Mary, and Steve (alphabetically listed since there’s no other way to put those four in a list) have guided my professional development like I couldn’t dream. I’ve learned how to learn, how to grow as a human and a professional.
Beyond that growth, they’ve all helped me become who I am today. That coach I wrote about in From Drowning to Thriving: How 7 Simple Reminders Changed My Leadership Journey? Doug. Go back and read that blog again to understand what impact he’s had on my life. Beyond even what I write in that blog, since I started Lead with Linnea, he’s been instrumental in not only guidance, but also in building my confidence and helping encourage an appropriate level of patience…. something I struggle with in both my personal and professional life.
The dynamic duo of Lew and Mary, you really can’t say one name without the other, how do you put to words the amount of knowledge they’ve given me? I have no words for it. The true love they have for their craft is inspirational and meaningful beyond measure. You cannot put a price tag on true dedication to developing others and caring about their futures.
Last, but certainly not least, Steve. Steve has proven to me that the dream is possible. He’s taught me all about choices and how I’m in charge of who I want to become. Beyond that, he’s shown me that I can make my own path and be true to myself in building who it is I want to become. Success isn’t a cookie cutter, it’s unique.
How to Learn from Everyday Mentorship Moments
Why do I tell you all about these people you probably don’t know and likely cannot even identify? What do they have to do with your story? EVERYTHING.
You can read a hundred books, you can climb a thousand mountains, you can blaze your own path. But, sometimes, just looking around and being engaged in your surroundings, you can learn more than you can ever imagine. It’s not all about the academics, nor the job tasks, it’s about the way people make you feel, the joy, the dedication that you can learn that means more than any academic endeavor.
The Hidden Requirement of Mentorship: Being Willing to See It
What I've come to realize over the years is that mentorship is everywhere—but only if you're willing to see it. The mentors I've described didn't all come with formal titles or scheduled weekly meetings. Many of these relationships developed organically because I was open to learning from others.
There's a saying that "when the student is ready, the teacher appears." I've found this to be profoundly true. Looking back, I can identify countless moments when mentorship was available to me, but I simply wasn't receptive to it. Perhaps I was too busy, too confident in my own abilities, or just not paying attention to the wisdom being offered.
The Hidden Prerequisite: Humility
The truth is mentorship requires humility. It demands that we acknowledge there are things we don't know and skills we haven't mastered. This vulnerability isn't always comfortable, but it's essential for growth. I've had to learn to quiet my own inner voice at times to truly hear what my mentors were sharing.
Some of the most valuable mentorship moments came when I least expected them—a passing comment in the hallway, an observation during a training or meeting, or even watching how someone managed a difficult situation. These weren't formal teaching moments, but they were invaluable learning opportunities because I was attuned to them.
Take most of the mentors I listed. Much of my time with them is spent in training situations in one-on-one settings to group training of over 100 people. The topics they are training on are not what I indicated I’ve learned most from them. What I’ve learned from them isn’t always the formal topic, it’s looking beyond the topic and observing the individual and gaining knowledge beyond just what is presented formally.
Mentorship Can Be Uncomfortable—And That’s a Good Thing
I've also realized that mentorship doesn't always feel good in the moment. Some of my greatest growth came from feedback that was difficult to hear or from situations where a mentor allowed me to struggle rather than immediately providing a solution. At the time, I might have wished for an easier path, but looking back, I recognize those challenging moments as gifts. Think emotions pouring out of me like a faucet for an example.
How to Tune in to Everyday Mentorship
For those seeking mentorship, my advice is simple but not always easy: be present, be humble, and be willing to learn from unexpected sources. Don't limit yourself to formal mentoring relationships or people with impressive titles. Some of my greatest mentors have been peers, subordinates, and even individuals outside my field entirely.
And perhaps most importantly, recognize that mentorship is a two-way street. While I've benefited immensely from the guidance of others, I've also found tremendous fulfillment in mentoring those coming up behind me. There's something powerful about paying forward the wisdom that's been shared with you, adapting it and making it your own before passing it along.
The mentors I've mentioned—Doug, Lew, Mary, Steve, and others—didn't just teach me facts or skills. They showed me how to be open to growth, how to recognize learning opportunities in everyday interactions, and how to constantly evolve as both a professional and a human being. Their greatest gift wasn't specific knowledge; it was teaching me how to be teachable.
I encourage you to look around with fresh eyes. Mentorship opportunities surround you, but they won't force themselves upon you. You must be willing to see them, embrace them, and learn from them. That willingness to receive guidance might just be the most important skill you'll ever develop.
6 Ways to Open Yourself to Hidden Mentorship
I hope you are inspired to become more open to mentorship opportunities around you. Here’s a quick look at the six ways:
Observe intentionally
Journal your learning
Ask better questions
Reflect weekly
Embrace discomfort
Pay it forward
1. Practice Intentional Observation
Set aside 10 minutes each day to observe how others manage situations. During meetings, put away your devices and watch how different people communicate, resolve conflicts, or present ideas. Ask yourself: "What can I learn from their approach?" This simple practice has helped me spot dozens of "mentorship moments" I would have otherwise missed.
2. Keep a Learning Journal
After interactions with people you admire, jot down specific things they did well, did poorly, or insights they shared. Keeping a small notebook to track these observations and review them regularly will keep them fresh and reinforce lessons that would have otherwise faded from memory. The act of writing helps cement the learning and creates a personal mentorship resource you can revisit.
3. Ask Better Questions
Instead of generic questions like "Do you have any advice?", try more specific ones: "I noticed how effectively you handled that conversation—what was your thought process?" or "What's one thing you wish someone had told you when you were at my career stage?" Targeted questions yield more actionable insights and signal to potential mentors that you're genuinely interested in learning.
4. Create Reflection Rituals
Schedule a weekly 30-minute session to reflect on what you've learned from others. During this time, consider three questions: Who taught me something this week? What did I learn? How can I apply this lesson? This ritual will transform passing interactions into lasting growth.
5. Embrace Discomfort
When you receive feedback that makes you defensive, practice saying "Thank you for that perspective" instead of immediately responding. Your instinct will be to feel hurt or upset, give yourself 24 hours to consider it objectively. Some of my most valuable mentorship moments came when I pushed past my initial resistance to difficult feedback.
6. Pay It Forward—Immediately
When someone teaches you something valuable, find a way to share that wisdom with someone else within 48 hours. Teaching or sharing will reinforce learning, and this practice trains you to recognize valuable insights when they appear. Plus, it creates a culture of mentorship around you that attracts more opportunities.
The Greatest Lesson: How to Be Teachable
Remember, becoming receptive to mentorship isn't just about finding the right mentors—it's about developing the right mindset. These practices have helped me transform from someone who occasionally benefited from formal mentorship to someone who finds learning opportunities in nearly every interaction. The mentors are already there; these tools will help you see them.
So, as you navigate your own career and life journey, I encourage you to look around with fresh eyes. Mentorship opportunities surround you, but they won't force themselves upon you. You must be willing to see them, embrace them, and learn from them. That willingness to receive guidance might just be the most important skill you'll ever develop.
Start Spotting Mentorship Moments Today
Mentorship isn’t always formal—it’s often hidden in plain sight. Now that you know what to look for, I challenge you to notice one mentorship moment this week. It could be a piece of feedback, an observation, or simply how someone handles a tough situation.
👇 Share your moment in the comments—or tag someone who's been an invisible mentor in your life.
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